…there’s always a but.
I’ve just started seeing someone new. He’s sweet, he’s nice, there’s none of these games that boys love to constantly play and it’s really damn easy. I’ve not once felt insecure, don’t feel the need to keep checking my phone and he even ticks all the boxes of The Potential New Boyfriend Equation.
I even got references from his ex and friends to see if he’d ever done any dickish things – I honestly don’t have it in me to have my heart broken, again. I’m about two breakups away from losing my faith in humanity altogether. But no. Nada. Not one thing. Squeaky clean.
Awesome.
But… and trust me, when it comes to me and boys, there’s always a but.
I slept with his brother.
What-the-actual-fuck?
I know, you’re doing this face right now. I’m doing this face right now too.
(Image via)
It was seven years ago, and it was after a week of partying in a field at Reading Festival and it was never a thing. And I can try and justify this embarrassing situation as much as I like. But it did happen.
I’ve just sat with the bestie drinking tea for the last two hours laughing about the complete and utter ridiculous things I get myself into, but this one tops this week’s list of awkward and you can’t make this shit up situations. And from a list that includes not understanding the European face-kiss-jig-dance thing, accidentally dressing up as an elf for a client meeting and being on a plane from London to Cornwall that the girl my ex left me for is working on, I think it’s got to be pretty damn awkward.
I mean. Do I tell him? Does he know? Will he care?
It’s an absolute minefield of questions that there is likely no nice answer to.
I’m probably going to have to go for drinks with said brother and the new boy over Christmas. How f-ing awkward is that going to be?
Could you imagine if this is it, the one. We could have kids. And I’d have slept with both their dad and uncle. Absolute, 100% cringe factor.
I fear I’m doomed from the start with this one – my care-free attitude has finally come and bitten me in the ass. It was bound to happen one day.
So I’m putting it out there for the lovely aliljoy readers. How the fuck do I handle this? Assuming he doesn’t read this, do I tell him? And how? Or do I just bury my past, forget it happened and hope to hell his brother doesn’t think it would be a hilarious story to share.
HELP!
– you can’t make this shit up
Tags: advice boys confession dating girl chat humour life lessons relationships sex
Categories: Cringe Factor Love & Relationships
6 Comments
I think at some point it’s advisable that you tell him. Ultimately the best relationships are water-tight and the trust is just unspoken so a secret such as this would not be able to stay hidden.
It’s just a question of timing and how you tell him so. Also I suppose, would you want to know if the situation was reversed? Personally, I think I would despite the fact it’s extremely uncomfortable.
Thanks Fiona, extremely sound advice! Turned out I didn’t get that far in the end anyway – the perfect man wasn’t so perfect! X
DEFINITELY tell him. If you don’t, it’s always going to be one of those things hanging over you. And those are the worst. You need to be able to trust one another if this becomes anything like something long-term.
If he can’t hack it, then just take this as a sign he wasn’t right – you would never be able to get that ultimate trust thing if you hadn’t told. You might kick yourself a little at first, but at least you were honest.
If he can hack it, he’s even more the brilliant man you hoped him to be, and your relationship will have SO MUCH potential.
Just, do it as gently as you can. Fingers crossed he hasn’t read this. x
Don’t rush into telling him, but I agree, in this case I think honesty is the best policy! You can’t get caught up in lies and you can’t live with the guilt hanging over you.
Picking an appropriate time is crucial. And the way you broach the subject is also very important. But be open and be prepared for his reaction (which could be dramatic and very likely furious). Either way having the balls to be truthful in this awkward situation shows your character – and if anything, he should respect you for telling the truth.
Good luck my lover! xx
Thanks guys! I didn’t even need to get that far in the end – turned out the boy had some issues that I couldn’t solve. God knows how he would have reacted in the end to this! Ho hum… next one?