Being a Scorpio I can hold a grudge for a long time and it can be incredibly draining. I could quite easily not talk to someone for the rest of my life if they really upset me. Unfortunately grudge-bearing is not compatible with working with teenagers.
Teenagers can be frustrating, exasperating and extremely rude for no apparent reason.
As much as I’d like to give them a piece of my mind, I often have to grit my teeth and get on with it. If you let the attitude they had with you a week before affect how you deal with them a week later, then you are not going to get anywhere.
I have taught myself to take a few deep breaths, have a moan about it to someone, and then forget about it. Well, I say forget about it, but I’m not very good at that, so I opt for pretending that it never happened instead. I have now lost count of the number of times that I have said ‘let’s have a fresh start tomorrow,’ and forced a smile.
Most of the time, having a fresh start is a positive step in moving forward and means that there is not a repeat of the negative situation. It doesn’t have a guaranteed success rate but it usually leads to some sort of improvement, even if it is only temporary.
Holding on to negativity just means that it will fester and grow and then you will probably explode.
Although it takes a bit of extra effort to let things go, it is worth it in the long run.
In 2013 The Mental Health Foundation said that ‘59% of British Adults said that life is more stressful than it was five years ago.’
I can totally understand that. Changes in Economy can lead to more social and financial pressures that we have to adapt to. Many things are beyond our control and we have to adapt to them and find an outlet for our anxiety.
It’s always a work in progress. Some days I feel like I want to go home, have a glass of wine and bawl my eyes out. But that’s not every day. Some days I’m better at learning to cope with all the stuff life throws at me than others, but that’s okay.
I’ve have decided to learn a lesson from Dory in Finding Nemo.
She doesn’t remember much, but she’s always happy. Forgetting stuff isn’t always a sign of weakness, it allows you to pick yourself up, dust yourself down, and get on with things. The only difference is that I am making an active choice to forget about them so that I can move on.
So, in the words of Dory herself, ‘Just keep swimming.’
If you enjoyed this post, why not check out ‘Ah, Yes, the Past Can Hurt. But It Can Also Remind You of Your Best Self’?