June 10, 2013 - Written by: Yazmin Joy

You Keep Pushing My Love Over A Borderline

Remember that Madonna song Borderline? I frickin’ love that tune. I used to dance to that song in my pj’s when I was a kid and sing into a hair brush! SHAMONE!! I guess I didn’t understand the significance of the song when I was a kid but over the past few years I have come to understand the importance of the borderline.

‘Just, try to understand, I’ve given all I can, coz you got the best of me.

Borderline, feels like I’m going to lose my mind, you just keep on pushing my love over the borderline…’ Borderline, Madonna

Recently, wherever I go I see big fat borderlines.

(Image 1 via, Image 2 via, Image 3 via)

Fences… office dividers…. road markings… these are all kinds of borderlines – parameters and the marking of thresholds, which the material world provides to guide us, warn us and clarify the distinction from one territory to another.

But what about the borderlines we use to protect our hearts? Do we take as much precaution with the boundaries of our emotions? Unlike the material world sometimes the boundaries for those who influence our feelings are less clear.

I think we all have that special someone who likes to take our compassion, goodness, consideration and emotion and quite frankly eat it, shit it back out and make us clean it up.

Sometimes our love is so deep for a person that we forgive again and again and again but they continue to push us beyond all reasonable limits until quite frankly there is nothing left to give.

Have you ever had someone push your love over the borderline? They let you down over and over again? They take you for granted. They may cheat or steal or even worse LIE.

‘Whhhhy is he/she doing this to me?’ you cry into your tear dampened pillow. You torture youself by asking: ‘Is this my fault? Do I deserve this?’

Maybe these people push you because they know they can? They know they can mess up and you will love them anyway? Or maybe because they don’t even realize how much hurt they are causing?

But believe me there will come a point when you just can’t take it anymore and you have to let go. Don’t get me wrong, the other person might never lose your love but they risk losing your respect and your capacity to withstand their stinky-ass bullshit.

‘I’m always the one who loves more, that’s my thing.’

– Jess, New Girl.

So many of us are like Jess. We just love more I guess. There is nothing wrong with loving more, some of us are just built that way. And I have never regretted giving someone second or even third chances.

To be honest, I don’t think love really has a borderline but let me tell you now girlfriend – SELF-RESPECT does.

Imagine a world without borderlines, boundaries, bollards… imagine the chaos, the carnage, the criminal activity. Now imagine your emotions, your heart, your mind. We are responsible for building our own borderlines PEOPLE! Because if you don’t then YOUR MIND will be chaos, carnage and an incubus of irrational mind-sick. Is that what you want?

The more I travel down this winding unpredictable road that is life I realise the importance of emotional borderlines. We do not build borderlines to contain our feelings or limit our capacity to love (you can’t control love), but instead we build them to serve as check points which remind us when we are about to cross into dangerous, unknown or unpredictable territory – also known as CRAZY-VILLE. They are put in place to warn us, guide us and most importantly protect our hearts.