Happy Cringemas!

Christmas is just around the corner, which inevitably means work dos, crimbo dinners and festive parties. This usually involves having to be social with some people that you know less well than others, which combined with varying amounts of mulled wine and other tipples, can lead to some awkward situations. It could range from a wardrobe malfunction to an under-the-mistletoe snog with someone you shouldn’t have.

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But ladies and gents, I’m sure that we have all had our fair share of embarrassing moments which are not confined to Christmas, but occur all year round. They seem to happen to me a lot more frequently than the average person, but I have this handy little coping mechanism of completely blanking them out. I have managed to dredge out a few that were tucked away in my box of shame to share with you.

The Should-Have-Gone-to-Specsavers-Moment

One day when I was at uni myself and my flatmates decided to go to the cinema. My friend offered to drive and went to get her car from where she had parked it around the corner. My other friend and I went downstairs to meet her outside. I trotted out enthusiastically and made my way to the car. For a few moments I tried the door handle and couldn’t understand why it was locked. I peered inside and saw that the driver was shaking their fist at me. At that moment my friend pulled up in the car behind. The car I had been trying to get into was a completely different colour and make!

The Bridget Jones Moment

A couple of years ago I went to a party of someone I didn’t know very well and got completely drunk. To be honest I can’t remember most of the night but the worst moment will stay for me forever. Once totally sloshed, I spotted a guy I knew from college. He was with all his mates and I decided to go and chat to him. I staggered over and I have no idea what I said but he acted quite normal with me, which was very kind of him considering how ridiculous I looked. I wanted a proper conversation but he managed to politely slip away when I wasn’t concentrating. When I realised, slightly delayed, I turned away disappointedly. It wouldn’t have been too bad if it wasn’t for the fact that I fell flat on my face- literally! I stared at the carpet pattern, not really sure what on earth was going on. I couldn’t move. Then I became aware that my dress had ridden up and was pinned underneath me, revealing my absolutely mahoosive control pants to a packed out pub. To make matters worse, my mum had to pick me up off of the floor.

Door Trouble

When I finished my undergrad course I applied for a PGCE. I had been rejected from most of my Unis when Oxford offered me an interview. I couldn’t believe it. I rehearsed my presentation for weeks, planned my answers to the questions I thought I would be asked, and spent ages choosing my smartest outfit. The interview day came and I felt sick. I arrived at the big, posh building with all the other candidates when we were led to the interview room. We walked across a courtyard to an old building which had revolving doors. I was stumped.

What is the revolving door etiquette? Do two people go in each section? Or should it be consecutive? Is it like toilet cubicles, where you have to leave a gap? I decided to go into the section behind the person in front of me. The door stopped moving. Shit. I looked around. My handbag had got stuck in the section behind. The person behind me had started to stare at me. I began to sweat. I didn’t want the interviewer to think I was a moron who couldn’t even walk through a door. I gave the door a subtle push, and then another. In the end I had to give it a forceful shove. I stumbled out and straightened up quickly, but it was too late. Everyone was laughing at me; needless to say, Oxford didn’t offer me a place!

Those were just three that I could remember but, believe me, there have been many more. Each time I wanted the ground to swallow me up and then spent the next week cringing about it.

Embarrassing moments happen to the best of us, but I’m getting older and would like to think that I’m handling them better. I don’t normally do New Year’s resolutions, but I’ve decided that it’s a good idea to stop caring about what everyone else thinks. It holds you back, makes you nervous and THEN you do something even more embarrassing!

If you trip in a room full of people, dust yourself off, hold your head high and move on (take a leaf out of J-Law’s book). The awkward moments aren’t important; it’s about how you deal with them. So go to your Christmas party, have a mulled-wine, be silly and don’t let social anxieties hold you back. Laugh about them, and then forget about them.

Happy Cringemas!

Tags: awkward christmas humour life lessons

Categories: a little piece of joy Cringe Factor