Faking It

Someone told me the other day that there was a shortage of red paint in hardware stores in the city because girls were painting the soles of their heels red to make them look like Christian Louboutins.

People can fake a lot of things in life. Orgasms, a tan, designer clothes…

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There are a lot of negative connotations towards faking it. But I’m going to go right out and say it:

When it comes to our emotions and basic survival, sometimes we NEED to fake it.

We’ve all faked something at one point or another. Sometimes I can’t help but think that faking aspects of ourselves comes with the territory of being a human being.

Have you ever faked confidence?

To the point you almost convinced yourself you were confident? I sure have. And you know what? Faking it actually remedied my situation in a weird way. The false confidence manifested into reality: I felt confident. Deeeep man.

Here’s what I think.

Faking it in the pursuit of truth and advancement is pretty smart.

On Friday I was leaving my office. I got into the lift with one of my colleagues, who was smiling – cool and collective. She just had a really infectious, positive energy about her.

‘How’s your day been?’ I asked cheerfully expecting a hearty response. Instead…

‘It was awful. JUST AWFUL.’ She exclaimed.

I was a little taken aback. HUH??! But she was smiling?!

‘This has been one of the worst weeks ever. I just have to keep up the smiles. I’ll be home soon.’ 

Turns out she was faking it. BIG TIME. And if I’m honest. I kind of respected the gal for it!

This isn’t about not being true to yourself or concealing your real identity but about getting through life even when you don’t really feel so positive about it all. This is about basic human SURVIVAL people!

Here are some instances when faking can actually be a good thing:

One. When you fake confidence.

Having the guts to step out of your comfort zone sometimes means faking it. Inside you are shitting yourself, you feel sick, want to run away faaaarr away, on the outside you have the demeanor of LL Cool J in the 1997 smash hit music video Phenominon. Sometimes it just has to be done.

Two. When you fake a positive reaction to make someone else feel better.

…because the truth will not be helpful and only cause more problems, hurt and stress in their lives. Be the person who speaks faith and positivity into someone else’s situation.

Three. When you fake happiness to get through the day BECAUSE OTHERWISE YOU WILL BREAKDOWN. 

Personally I find it really hard to fake my emotions. But sometimes your team, friends, family, boss or colleagues need you to hold it together.

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Do you think leaders always feel like leading? Parents always want to be enthusiastic towards their young kids sloppy artwork (THAT JUST LOOKS LIKE A GIANT MESS TO ME BUT WHATEVER *SMILE*)?

Do you think that guy serving your coffee wants to make your damn tall, one shot caramel macchiato with SOYA? He might actually want to lean over and punch you. Ever think about that??? He might be having a bad day. But he smiles through it.

We often fake our emotions because we love the people around us more, because our hearts were strong today, or maybe because we didn’t lose sight of the bigger picture – we needed to hold it together.

As long as you don’t lose grip on yourself and you remain honest with your loved ones, faking it isn’t all bad, not really, not when it comes to getting through life.

‘Nuff ramblings. Have a great week peeps!

Tags: confidence faking it happiness Joy Stress

Categories: From the Heart Mirror Mirror: Self Improvement Yazmin Joy