The Power of Encouragement

I’m not sure whether everyone has enough solid self belief to chase their dreams. I know I certainly don’t. As a child, you get tonnes of praise for doing things the right way, often you would in school when you did something that impressed the teachers and then less frequently in college or university.

To me, it seemed liked you had to produce something truly spectacular to get any praise for your efforts at university – and that praise was generally a very impersonal scribble on your essay or an electronically submitted grade, accompanied with electronic feedback.

It’s the same around friends. At school there might have been competitions to see who was the fastest runner, who knew their times tables the best or the pair that had recreated the best version of the handshake from The Parent Trap.

But as time went on, and you developed your own interests, it became more difficult to compare yourself to your friends, or even show them your skills.

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The more people I seem to see, the harder it seems to impress them. Now, the fact that we can see pretty much anything instantaneously, thanks to the internet, means that we are super hard to impress, or even to shock, for that matter. People’s high shock tolerance these days worries me… but that’s another story.

I feel like, as an adult, we don’t always get the encouragement we could use. For example, imagine that you are having a tough week at your new job and are struggling to get your head around all the new things. One colleague reacts in an exasperated way, frustrated that you need reminding how to do things, the other stops what they’re doing, and comes over to talk you through how it’s done in a friendly manner. Which one are you going to react better to?

One, will likely make you feel even more frustrated and less likely to ask when you encounter another problem. The other will relax you and make you more confident to ask for reassurance.

Why is encouragement so important?

When I was struggling with a lot of changes, I was taught that if you force things, whether it be yourself or one someone else, you’re likely to reject the ideas and back away. If you encourage it, in small steps, it doesn’t seem as daunting and you can help yourself or others to achieve it.

The best piece of advice I’ve received is: break things down into small chunks. Sounds obvious right?

But I can’t tell you how many times I’ve sat and cried because I’ve felt overwhelmed. Each time, I overcame it by thinking about the smallest, easiest thing I could start with and taking it from there – encouraging myself to tackle the impossible, one little chunk at a time!

When you’re looking for a job, often you stumble across ones that make you question whether or not you meet the person specifications, and you’re not sure whether or not to apply.

You are much more likely to go for it, if someone suggests it to you, with the the words: ‘I think you would be really good at this’.

What about when the opportunity to do someone thing really exciting presents itself, but you doubt your resilience to go through such a major change?

A friend’s words of gentle encouragement are often enough to put your mind at ease, and maybe even convince you to make the leap: ‘Go on, it’s such a fantastic opportunity! You know where I am, if you need me. You’ll be great!’

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What I’m saying, especially after reading that there are 5 million people in Britain who feel that they do not to have any real friends, is that we could do with spreading a little encouragement and support.

Not everyone has parents who encouraged them as children. Not everyone had a teacher that believed in them. Not everyone has supportive friends.

Sometimes, when you’re presented with an amazing opportunity, it’s difficult to get an objective opinion from the people around you – they might just be a little bit jealous.

I think it’s time to think less about ourselves, and give others around us a bit of a boost.

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Recently, I had a little encouragement handed my way, which made me go for something that I would not usually have gone for. If you think that somebody close to you could do with a bit of reinforcement and encouragement, practice it.

Be happy for them, show them that amazing opportunity, don’t keep it to yourself.

Learn how to support the people around you and encourage them to do the best and be the best that they can be.

I think we all struggle a bit, and the simplest thing you can do to turn someone’s day around, is to show them you have faith in who they are.

If you enjoyed this article, why not check out ‘Incredible Introverts: Channelling Your Inner Self‘?

Tags: encouragement Joy praise self belief support

Categories: a little piece of joy Mirror Mirror: Self Improvement