So, where are you from?

So there I am hanging out at the fruit & veg aisle of the supermarket, you know, buying groceries. When out of the blue a complete stranger approaches…

Stranger: Hi.

Me: Hi.

Stranger: Sooooo where are you from?

Me: Me?

Stranger: Yeah.

Me: I’m from Cornwall.

Stranger: I mean originally.

Me: Cornwall.

Stranger (getting annoyed): No I mean, where were you born?

Me: Truro. Cornwall.

I can see the confusion in his eyes. This doesn’t make sense to him.

Stranger: No, I mean where are your parents from.

Me: Well my dad’s from Cornwall. And my mum’s from India.

Stranger: Ahhh so you’re Indian.

Me: Well I’m half Indian, but –

Stranger: I love Indian food.

Me: That’s great.

Stranger: Have you been home much?

Me: What, to Cornwall?

Stranger: No, to India?

Me: I don’t live in India. I live in Cornwall…. Sorry, I need to get on. I’m just kind of in the middle of something.

I pick up a grapefruit. 

Stranger: No need to get all defensive about it.

Me: Excuse me?

Stranger: Fine, whatever. Have a nice day.

He then flounces off, as if I’m the one with the damn problem here. 

This sketch by Ken Tanaka is basically my life:

Introducing the most irritating question in the world: Where are you from? 

A question I get asked about 3 times a week, and have been asked about 6734938bjkdi61dk7873 times in my life already. I’m not kidding.

I find that usually people will ask you where you are from for 2 reasons:  

1. They want to develop a connection with you.

(Which is kind of sweet. Sort of. )

(Image via)

2. OR they want to put you into a BOX so they can decide what they think of you.

Now I know some people will be thinking: hey Yaz, it ain’t that bad a question to be asked. And my response to that would be – the simpler your answer – probably the less likely you will find this question annoying.

I’m from Cuba. I’m from Pakistan. I’m from Ireland. One sentence answers. Simples.

But what if your answer isn’t that simple?

What if you’re mixed race? Or have lived in many places? Or you don’t look like you’re from the area you say you’re from? Or you’re just a private person? What if you DON’T HAVE TIME to talk to this complete stranger about your ethnic origins while you’re shopping for grapefruit? 

What’s EVEN more annoying is when you tell someone where you’re from and they DON’T BELIEVE YOU. I mean, do you want me to develop a identity crisis or what?!?!

Why can’t people just accept my answer when I give it to them?

I know it’s confusing for some people, but life is confusing. Did you ever think it might not be any of your business young squire?

What actually constitutes where you are from anyways?  

Where you were born? Where your parents are from? Where you live? Or what you look like? When it comes to people who ask this question, in my experience it seems to boil down to the latter. So why don’t you just ask me what you really wanna know:

Why do you look different/the same as me? 

Or, here’s a better idea: why don’t you just treat me like a gawd-damn human being here and have a normal conversation with me? My cultural heritage will probably come up naturally anyway – and we might even end up friends.  You don’t need to push it out of me at the fruit and veg aisle – come on now!

Rant over.

Have a great week peeps!

x

If you enjoyed this article, check out ‘I need a Dollar, Dollar…’?

Tags: Joy Ken Tanaka race society What kind of Asian are you? Where are you from?

Categories: Rant Yazmin Joy