October 9, 2011 - Written by:

Get Your Face Outtta My Facebook

Sooo let’s not go into positives, because we all know there are plenty of ‘em. This is about when Facebook goes wrong. Very wrong. 

Facebook should be called ASBO-book, really. 

Is it me or are people getting touchy with status updates?

The other day I logged into my account and innocently browsed my news feed. Louise had got a haircut. Good job Louise. Marty had been down the shops and picked up a Cornetto. Mmm… Cornetto. Sam had trimmed his hamster’s bum hair. Etc etc. But then trouble ensued…

I get in trouble.

My friend, lets call him ‘Lionel’, had just mentioned he had gorged on a mountain of Ben and Jerry’s and wafflesI light-heartedly commented, whilst salivating slightly myself, ‘a moment on the lips, a life time on the hips’ – how jolly witty I thought. Then I proceeded to check my emails.

Two minutes later a little red marker popped up in the top of the page.

Some chick who I have never met in my life had commented back. It read:

‘Go large or go home.’

I sat puzzled. Was this young lady talking to me? Go large? Whatever could this mean?  Go home? I was home. Good grief, did she not know it was a joke?!?!

‘Eat what you want!’

Followed with exclamation mark ! . At this point I want to make it clear I was in no way giving dietary advice.


I once had a go at an ex-boyfriend when I caught him flirting with a girl who’s profile picture was of her posing in her underwear. I would have preferred it if she had at least a pullover on. This, as you can imagine, caused  a little tension. Which leads me to ponder: 

Does Facebook cause more harm to our relationships then good?

In the The Social Network movie did no one else notice that even the Facebook co-founder’s girlfriend kicked off when he didn’t update his relationship status from ‘single’ to ‘in a relationship’??? I mean that can be a pretty heinous betrayal in some couples. 

Being in a Relationship on Facebook is a bit like marking your territory, not too dissimilar to the habit of wild muskrats. 

In the film the girlfriend sets fire to his apartment.  


(Image via)

It got me thinking; this Facebook can be a bit of a trouble maker.  I mean I was getting stressed about some miniscule things… but they just seemed so much bigger on my computer screen.

My research led me to YouTube where I found many who shared my reservations with the networking site.

‘Facebook is the Devil’ (my personal favourite) was the IT equivalent of an exorcism. Hundreds of people scarred by the site have vented their frustration. Check it out. It’s hilarious!

Some people say you can’t get away from Facebook, that it infiltrates your life; at home, at work, on your phone. The thing is Facebook is not a person. I think I need to remind myself this more often. It’s a website people!

My Advice (to Myself)

If you come into contact with anti-social networking just switch off your computer and have a nice cuppa. Happy days! Sometimes it is the only way to stay connected to reality.  

Rant over! 

Have a great week peeps! x

If you enjoyed this article, why not check out ‘Facebook Frustration‘?



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