May 18, 2015 - Written by: Yazmin Joy

On Being Confident: Learning Jenny Garrett’s Three A’s

We all have fears, but I have been thinking recently about how far we let our fears permeate into our lives in the realist of ways? Do your fears hold you back? Do they stress you out? Do you allow them to chain you and obliterate your self-confidence in situations where you have every opportunity to shine?

So here’s a confession…

I have a fear of the telephone. Okaaaay, I know it’s totally nuts and irrational. I’m not talking about my own phone, I’m fine with answering my personal mobile, but when I am thrown into business and corporate situations the phone terrifies me.

The problem is, I’m a temp. Which has meant I’ve had to face my fear head on. My fear seems to be hinged on self-doubt – what if I can’t help the person on the other end of the phone? What if I drop an important call? What if I lose this job? I need this job otherwise I WON’T BE ABLE TO EAT. NOOOOOOOOOOO!

Another fear I have is of being attacked in the street.

Standard – I know.

Most people don’t really want to be attacked but I have a genuine and daily fear of it. If I have to walk home late I will plan my whole evening around my journey. Am I wearing sensible shoes? Will I be able to run? Do I have a weapon? Do I NEED a weapon? Can my shoes be a weapon?

To be fair, I was attacked in the street a few years ago. Read my blog ‘I got mugged last night. This is what I learnt’ for all the super dramatic details – which is when this fear began.

The point is, it has taken me a long time to find the confidence to walk home by myself at night. I keep checking the bushes to make sure there’s no pesky criminals waiting to pounce on me and steal my phone.

As we become more aware of the world, more fears seem to manifest. These fears can dramatically damage our confidence and affect our performance. I keep having to remind myself that I need to learn wisdom, but unlearn fear as I make my way through this rocky road called life.

How to combat your fears?

When Girls Talk London Sessions interviewed leadership coach and Rocking Your Role author Jenny Garrett she spoke about her three A’s to boosting confidence. I have been lucky enough to work with Jenny on a few projects and I always find her wisdom empowering.

(Remel, Dean, Jenny, Vanessa and I inbetween filming. Photo by lovely Alina Kay)

If you feel like your confidence is dwindling in any area of your life Jenny’s three A’s can help by shifting perspective…

1. Awareness

‘Awareness of others is wisdom, awareness of self in enlightenment’.

I agree with Jenny, I believe true confidence comes from knowing your circumstances, accepting your true self – flaws and all. Yes – I might be afraid of walking home but I also have courage and determination to overcome my fear. Whatever happens I can deal with it.

2. Articulate

‘Articulate your story – know what your story is and be unapologetic about it’.

Taking the time to OWN our back story to the point we can communicate it well will help us elevate ourselves to a position of confidence.

3. Act

‘I don’t mean fake it till you make it – I mean just DO’.

Confidence doesn’t happen over night, it comes through DOING what we fear and overcoming.

There is a quote by Eleanor Roosevelt I just love: ‘We gain strength, and courage, and confidence, by each experience in which we really stop to look fear in the face… we must do that which we think we can not’. Isn’t that just awesome?

You can watch the full Girls Talk London Sessions interview with Jenny below:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gzfwiGsTJvo

Have a great week peeps!

If you enjoyed this post why not check out ‘Finding Your Telescope’?